Bartleby the Scrivener (vegan27) wrote in quran_thugs,
Bartleby the Scrivener

Sura No. 4 - Women

The ethics of Islam

Muhammad was born into an unimaginably barbaric time and place. Women could not inherit property, and "worthless" female infants were often disposed of by being buried alive. Muhammad opposed both of these practices, among others. Islam was a civilizing force when viewed in the context of seventh century Arabia.

However, it may be that much of Muhammad's ethics are out of date. I don't believe that the Qur'an is still a "relevant" text. Modern Muslims explain that the "kill the infidels" quotations aren't general commandments, but they refer to very specific groups of armed, aggressive individuals at the time the words were revealed. In that case, the text is all the more "irrelevant" for today's spiritual seekers. I believe that, if the prophet was a messenger of the Creator of the universe, then his ethics would be timelessly radical (e.g. the Sermon on the Mount).

Having said that, let us continue with the text...


Having been an orphan himself, and not wanting the Meccans to confiscate the property he left behind in their city, Muhammad wrote, "And give to the orphans their property, and substitute not worthless (things) for (their) good (ones), and devour not their property (adding) to your own property. This is surely a great sin." (v.2) You should provide for orphans and not steal from them.


Muhammad permits Muslim men to marry up to four wives, as long as they can financially support them. He must have received special permission from Allah, because he took more than four himself. If you cannot support more than one wife, "then (marry) only one or that which your right hands possess" (3). In other words, have only one wife or a sex slave. Seriously. By the way, women are NOT permitted to have more than one husband.

Fortunately, men are forbidden to steal back the dowries given to their wives.

When dividing up inheritance, "the male is the equal of the portion of two females" (11). Critics say that Islam views men to be twice as valuable as women. Muslims point out that women received NOTHING before this, and that half a portion is better than nothing. In any case, following this law today would be absurd.

If a woman engages in any kind of illicit sex, "call to witness against them four (witnesses) from among you; so if they bear witness, confine them to the houses until death takes them away or Allah opens a way for them" (15). It's not clear what "confine them to the houses until death" means, but some say that it basically means to lock the woman up until she starves to death.

Now, if two men have sex--since homosexuality is a sin in Islam--"give them both a slight punishment; then if they repent and amend, turn aside from them. Surely Allah is ever Oft-returning (to mercy), the Merciful." (16).

Muslim men are allowed to leave their wives to other male family members after they die, as if they were inheritance. However, you do need the widow's permission, and you have to be nice to her.

Muhammad lists the women whom one is forbidden to marry:
...mothers, and your daughters, and your sisters, and your paternal aunts, and your maternal aunts, and brother's daughters and sister's daughters, and your mothers that have suckled you, and your foster-sisters, and mothers of your wives, and your stepdaughters who are in your guardianship (born) of your wives to whom you have gone in...the wives of your sons who are of your own loins; and that you should have two sisters together... (23)

A Muslim man is also forbidden to wed a women who is already married, unless she is a sex slave whom he owns: "And all married women except those whom your right hands possess (are forbidden)" (24). Fornication is also disallowed.

Verse 29 has the Islamic version of the sixth commandment. Instead of saying, "Thou shalt not kill," Muhammad writes, "And kill not your people." I.e., other Muslims. Non-Muslims, minding their own business, traveling in a merchants' caravan, may be freely plundered and murdered.

You may now punch the bride

"[G]ood women are obedient" (34). What should Muslim husbands do when their wives are disobedient? Fist, they should "admonish them". If that doesn't work, they should "leave them alone in the beds"--i.e., withhold sex. Finally, if that doesn't work, Muslims husbands should "chastise" their wives. That's what this translation says. Other translators are less ambiguous. The translation entitled The Noble Qur'an says "beat them (lightly, if it is useful)"; Translator Yusuf Ali writes, "beat them (lightly)"; and Shakir just says straight-up, "beat them".

Let's balance that shit out with something nice:
[B]e good to the parents and to the near of kin and the orphans and the needy and the neighbour of (your) kin and the alien neighbour, and the companion in a journey and the wayfarer and those whom your right hands possess [slaves]. (36)


Do not pray if you have ejaculated semen and haven't taken a bath since, unless you are on a journey. Also:
And if you are sick, or on a journey, or one of you come from the privy [outhouse], or you have touched the women, and you cannot find water, betake yourselves to pure earth, then wipe your faces and your hands. (43)

Wow. Women are so dirty that, if you touch them, you can clean yourself with dirt. Women are dirtier than DIRT!


What happens to non-Muslims when they die?
Those who disbelieve in Our Messages, We shall make them enter Fire. As often as their skins are burned, We shall change them for other skins, that they may taste the chastisement. Surely Allah is ever Mighty, Wise. (56)

Does Allah command Muslims to fight against us infidels?
O you who believe, take your precautions, then go forth in detachments or go forth in a body. ...

So let those fight in the way of Allah who sell this world's life for the Hereafter. And whoever fights in the way of Allah, be he slain or be he victorious, We shall grant him a mighty reward.

And what reason have you not to fight in the way of Allah, and of the weak among the men and the women and the children, who say: our Lord, take us out of this town, whose people are oppressors, and grant us from Thee a friend, and grant us from Thee a helper!

Those who believe fight in the way of Allah, and those who disbelieve fight in the way of the devil. So fight against the friends of the devil [
i.e., non-Muslims]; surely the struggle of the devil is ever weak. (71,74-76)

What does Allah think of Muslims who dislike killing non-Muslims?
But when fighting is prescribed for them, lo! a party of them fear men as they ought to fear Allah, or with a greater fear, and say: Our Lord, why hast Thou ordained fighting for us? Wouldst Thou not grant us respite to a near term? Say: The enjoyment of this world is short, and the Hereafter is better for him who keeps his duty. (77)

Fucking great.

Islamic theodicy... an anagram for "Camel shit idiocy."

Does Allah cause bad things to happen?
If good befalls them, they say: This is from Allah; and if a misfortune befalls them, they say: This is from thee. Say: All is from Allah. (78)

Oh, so Allah causes both good things and bad things to happen to people?
Whatever good befalls thee (O man), it is from Allah, and whatever misfortune befalls thee, it is from thyself. (79)

But... but you just said... make up your damn mind!!
And if (the Qur'an) were from any other than Allah, they would have found in it many a discrepancy. (82)

Well, that confirms my suspicion...


Muhammad claimed to be a prophet of a religion that is a continuation of Christianity, yet it didn't seem to concern anybody that he totally flushed the ethics of Jesus and the apostles down the toilet. Jesus told us to "not resist the evil doer" and "love your enemy"--Paul wrote, "Bless those who persecute you" and "Do not repay anyone evil for evil". Peter also told us, "Do not return evil for evil or insult for insult, but instead bless others" and "it is better to suffer for doing good...than for doing evil".

What does Muhammad say?
They long that you should disbelieve as they have disbelieved so that you might be on the same level; so take not from among them friends until they flee (their homes) in Allah's way. Then if they turn back (to hostility), seize them and kill them wherever you find them, and take no friend nor helper from among them, except those who join a people between whom and you there is an alliance, or who come to you, their hearts shrinking from fighting you or fighting their own people...

You will find others who desire to be secure from you and secure from their own people. Whenever they are made to return to hostility, they are plunged into it. So if they withdraw not from you, nor offer you peace and restrain their hands, then seize them and kill them wherever you find them. And against these We have given you a clear authority.

Surely the disbelievers are an open enemy to you.

Women again

Muhammad at least says that, if a woman fears ill treatment from her husband, they are allowed to divorce without sin.

He also points out why polygamy is a stupid idea: "And you cannot do justice between wives, even though you wish (it)" (129). In other words, it is impossible to treat your multiple wives equally without showing preference for one over the other.

Stick to your own kind

Remember what Muhammad says about being friends with non-Muslims:
Give news to the hypocrites that for them is a painful chastisement--those who take disbelievers for friends rather than believers.

...when you hear Allah's messages disbelieved in and mocked at, sit not with them until they enter into some other discourse, for then indeed you would be like them. Surely Allah will gather together the hypocrites and the disbelievers all in hell...

O you who believe, take not the disbelievers for friends rather than the believers. Do you desire to give Allah manifest proof against yourselves? (144)


Do Muslims believe in the crucifixion of Jesus? In the middle of yet another anti-Semitic rant, Muhammad writes:
[The Jews say:] "We have killed the Messiah, Jesus, son of Mary, the messenger of Allah," and they killed him not, nor did they cause his death on the cross, but he was made to appear to them as such. And certainly those who differ therein are in doubt about it. They have no knowledge about it, but only follow a conjecture, and they killed him not for certain: Nay, Allah exalted him in His presence. And Allah is ever Mighty, Wise. (157-158)

Jesus was not crucified. Allah created an illusion to make people think that he was, and then he brought the real Jesus up to Heaven.

Was Jesus even the son of Allah?
The Messiah, Jesus, son of Mary, is only a messenger of Allah and His word which He communicated to Mary and a mercy from Him. So believe in Allah and His messengers. And say not, Three. Desist, it is better for you. Allah is only one God. Far be it from His glory to have a son. (171)

Allah had no son. That's true, say Christians, because Allah is not the God of the Bible. As I've said before, Muslims HATE the SHIT out of the idea of Trinity. They say it is polytheism. If you ever want to "out" a closet Muslim, just ask him what he thinks about Trinity. He will speak with an uncanny contempt.
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